A Hobby of Cordial Visits
by comintrix
Summary: This heat is too much. I can't help thinking when it's this hot and I can't think or I do things that I'm probably going to regret. I can't regret her.
1. Chapter 1: Correct Thickness of Steel

It is hot. It is so hot that I feel like I could melt. All I can really do is lay on my bed in my underpants and look at the ceiling while sweating. Thinking is never good for me. The other day I was thinking too much and I did something I never thought that I would.

I had put her away three years ago after she sort of went on a rampage. Drakken finally made her snap. I know she kind of snapped because she stayed in jail. She let herself be taken in and stayed in jail. I went away to college in Upperton, I graduated a year early and I got a job for GJ right out of school. It all felt really...pointless though. I never really stopped thinking about her.

It bothered me at first. I hated thinking about her. I hated that I missed fighting her or even just seeing her. It bothered me a lot. It started to not bother me as time went on though. I started to like thinking about her and I enjoyed the time that she spent on my mind. I thought a little too hard the other day though.

It was hot like it is today and I was thinking much the same about her. Before I realized what was happening with my feet, I was facing Betty Director. She was raising her eyebrow at my stuttering and stumbling. When she stood up to face me, I was just frightened enough to spit it out. I told her that Shego should be let out of jail.

She actually started laughing in my face.

"What? I'm serious!" I tried to get her to listen to me, but it wasn't looking promising.

"Serious? Serious? What's serious is that we have one of the most dangerous criminals around in jail and she's actually staying there!"

"Right! And isn't that saying something? She's staying. Doesn't that show that she's changed?"

"It shows that we finally have her surrounded by the correct thickness of steel!"

"It's been three years. Don't you think that's enough?"

"Miss Possible, what has gotten into you? You know the punishment for the amount of grand larceny and general havoc she was involved in."

"She was just doing her job."

"Miss Possible, what's the real reason that you're here asking me for this?" I'm here because I can't get Shego off my mind. There. Now if only I could say that to Dr. Director. Of course, I couldn't. So I stayed silent and she came around her desk to put a hand on my shoulder.

"Miss Possible, go home. Everything is under control with Miss Go and any guilt that you are feeling for the situation is just in passing, I promise. You did the right thing. She is where she belongs." She lead me out the door while spinning exit pleasantries. I stood stunned for a moment after she closed the door behind me. I rubbed my head and tried to figure out what had convinced me that talking to Dr. Director was a good idea. I developed a headache as I was driving home and went to sleep early so that I wouldn't be tempted by any other brilliant ideas.

Of course, here I am again thinking, thinking of her and wondering why I'm sitting here and letting this happen. I am Kimberly Ann Possible and I can do anything, even get Shego out of jail. Hearing that in my head made me do a double take of myself. I must be going crazy to be thinking about getting Shego out of jail. She's there because she deserves to be there. Does she though? She was basically just following orders on most of the really illegal stuff that she had done. You can't exactly blame her for wanting to get paid.

And so its been flying through my head now. I've thought of all sorts of scenarios from completely legal ones to some where I end up destroying the jail and carrying her off Tarzan style. After thinking of some truly fantastic escapes, I can't help but wonder why I am thinking of this to begin with. The answer is fairly clear: I want her. I'm not entirely sure which way that I want her.

My mind has been a bit of a mess since Shego started to take over. I'm not sure what I want, I'm not sure what I need, I'm not sure why. If asked for a good explanation of why, I would stumble over myself like I did with Betty Director and end it with a "because".

Scarily, what I am feeling, I think I've felt before. In high school or sometimes while watching certain celebrates, I felt this way. It's a little different with Shego, but I know that I've had this feeling.

Its a crush. As in puppy love. As in 'I think I might be a little gay' crush. Apparently, you roll around in a grapple with your best enemy for a while and suddenly they're in your sex dreams.

I probably shouldn't have admitted to that one, but it was a one time thing. Well, one and a half. Either way, there she was and I'll be damned if my mind's vision of her wasn't totally hot. And, of course after that, I've been having trouble getting that image out of my mind, not that I really mind having it there.

The heat is too much. The sweat is seeping into my brain and making me crazy. I need to go do something that I may regret, but I am not going to be stopped.

And once again, the nerves in my feet betray me and I have somehow made my way to the high security prison. I shake my head back to reality as I pull my finger away from the call button. There is a heavy metallic thud and an electric buzzing as the gate slowly opens and two guards with visible bullet proof vests come to gather me. I'm not actually here, I just think that I am. Of course, then I'm in front of the warden and she knows my name and is happy to see me after all of the criminal backwash that I've sent in over the years.

I'm here to check in my old foe. I've decided to take up a hobby of cordial visits. I hear myself say something that I guess was believable because next they're leading me down a row of heavy metal doors. At the end, there's a door with a flattened purple origami swan taped to the window. I know immediately that I'm going to see her come out of that one, not the plain one to my left or right. Sure enough with a turn of a key and the entry of an electronic passcode, a lock clicks and I am able to peer behind the door to see an amazing sight indeed.

Hanging from the ceiling, taped to the walls, littered on the floor, strewn over the desk and bed, there are hundreds, perhaps thousands of origami figures. Peering further in, I can see the figure of my dreams sitting at a desk with a stack of coloured pages. She finishes a beautiful bird figure before she turned to us.

"Can I help you gentlemen?" She says as she turned in her chair. The second her eyes lay on me, her expression goes wide and amazed. She stares openly as she gets up. It doesn't look like she's going to kill me...

"Kimmy?" She asks as she walks cautiously to me.

"Hi, Shego." I put on a smile to try to make things less awkward. She grins at me.

"What are you doing here?" She's still walking to me cautiously. I end up holding out my arms to her. I can feel the confused stares of the guards burn through my back. She takes my hand softly in hers and stops.

"I...It's just been a while. Just want to make sure that you're still doing alright." She's staring deep into my eyes as if she's waiting for me to do something: to lunge at her, to slap her, to get mad at her. I don't want to do any of that of course. I with that she would trust me.

"Ladies, would you like to move into the gathering room?" The guards startle me when they question us.

"Yes please." Shego answers softly. The next thing I know, I'm sitting at a table that looks like it was taken right out of my middle school cafeteria. Shego sits across from me and the guards go to a post by the door. They're far enough to not hear us, but close enough to jump in and kick some butt if the need arises. Shego still has my hand in hers. She seems to be examining it now.

"Why in the world are you here, Princess?"

"To be honest, I still don't really know. I just felt like I haven't seen you in so long."

"You haven't. It's been three years." She didn't sound resentful or angry. That's kind of her thing. She doesn't even have angry anymore...

"I'm...I'm sorry." I finally spit something out, even if its not anything that I wanted to say.

"You don't have to be, Kimmy."

"It's just that..."

"I miss you too, Kim." I'm stunned momentarily from her statement. Not only did it seem like she had read my mind, she misses me? She even used my real name. I think she notices my confusion.

"There isn't a whole lot to do in here except think. I realized that you are something special, Kim."

"Special?" I know that I sound like a bumbling fool.

"Yes special, Kim. There are very few people who can hold their own against me. There is no one who has ever given me the rush that you have." She lets me go and sits back looking casually in my direction. There is silence for a few seconds. It seems a lot longer. I don't know what to say in response.

"You can talk to me, Kimmy. I'm not as abusive as I was. With Drakken out of the picture, I just don't have a whole lot to be all that upset over. I haven't seen my brother Hego in like, 2 years which is also a major stress relief." She grins at me as she seems almost majestic. I search my mind for something to say.

"What did you do to him?" I say softly and watch to see if she is going to kill me too.

"Are you asking if I killed him? I didn't kill him. Actually, I didn't kill anyone. I never liked killing people. Destruction, now that's a different thing. I knocked down a lot of stuff. I burned a bunch too. Theft for no real reason, I was just really pissed off, Princess." She sighs heavily and I can somehow feel her whole being stiffen up.

"I bet." I say softly. I reach for her hand and she takes my lead, thankfully. I stroke the backs of her hands with my thumbs and slowly feel her relax in my grip.

"Listen, I think I know why you're here and I have an inkling of what's going through your head, Kimmy. And it's best if you just let it go." I can feel my throat sinking in.

"I'm not rejecting you, I'm just trying to save you from this train wreck."

"What-what do you mean?" I can feel my whole body stutter. Shego's hand is now clutching mine firmly but comfortingly.

"You've been having some thoughts about me, right Cupcake?" She smiles softy and I feel my mouth drop open.

"Thought so. Kimmy, it's okay. Want to know a secret? I've thought about you quite a bit. It's all a little confusing, but I've come to terms with the fact that this isn't going anywhere." She is still smiling but I can see the sadness melt into her expression. I strengthen my grip on her hands.

"I...It's not futile! If you don't want me, just say so!" No, not the tears. This visit was not supposed to be like this. I was going to see her, it was all going to hit me that what I was feeling was insane and then I was going to leave. And now I'm crying. I'm crying over Shego.

I didn't even notice when she pulled her chair next to me. As she's holding me, I just want to run. It wasn't supposed to go like this. I'm getting flashes to my plans of breaking her out. I'm thinking of pushing her out the door right now. She is mine and I want her. I need her with me. This isn't going to go away. I'm not going to get over this. I'm stubborn. I want what I want.

"Kim. Pull it together, Pumpkin. I know you can." She's stroking my back and I can feel every single place that she touches me. It shoots up my spine and shocks my brain and I'm sure now that I can't leave this. Before I can stop myself, I'm staring into her eyes and clawing onto her shoulders.

"Come with me." She leans in and she looks beyond confused.

"No, I mean it. Come with me. Come home with me. Right now." I can feel the slime from my tears on my cheeks and it feels like its crawling all over my face. My eye is twitching slightly. My heart is pounding. My head is spinning in circles. I can't focus. I can barely see. I have tunnel vision centered on Shego's face.

I feel a breeze flow over me swiftly and I am embracing her. Or rather, she is embracing me. My head is not spinning anymore, but I feel my heart sink when I feel a drop on my bare shoulder.

"I know, Kimmy. I really do. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry." The next sensation that I feel is that of every cell in my body exploding around me as if it were some fantastic fireworks display. When convince myself to open my eyes, there she is with her eyes closed and serene. I feel instantly cold as her lips leave mine.

It wasn't even a deep kiss, but now all can feel is the left over pinpricks from her. She still hasn't opened her eyes and I can feel her breath softly on my chin, waiting carefully for the moment to come back to the penitentiary gathering room. I watch in slow motion as her eyes open and her deep green eyes settle on me, half-lidded.

We don't have to say anything. I am affirmed in what I feel and I'm sure that she felt just as I did. I am sure when she takes me back into her arms that something needs to be done. I am Kim Possible. Anything is Possible.

* * *

_**I have no idea where this came from. I was messing with different styles of first person and this is what you get. I hope it works. Let me know. I don't own KP but I own what I write.**_


	2. Chapter 2: Our Green Crane

And here I am again, of course. It's been three months and I do this every weekend. My room is filled with origami swans and birds and all sorts of figurines. She sits and talks with me for hours on end and when the guards call leaving time, we always linger slightly. I never want to let go. She holds onto my hand, squeezing tighter for just one quick moment. Every week that moment gets longer. She stares into my eyes and I can feel her longing to stay with me as much as I long to stay with her.

And here we are, sitting at the table. She's finally teaching me how to make a flapping crane. Hers is so crisp and lovely where mine is uneven and lumpy. She guides my fingers as I am attempting to fold this page and I think that might be why I'm so clumsy, or at least a part of it. I mean, I'm no origami artist, but I think my hands that tremble slightly are from some other source. I love how soft her touch is. I've missed it over three years and I miss it every time that they make me leave this place without her.

There is a drug within her touch, I am sure of it. Whatever this drug is, I am so very addicted to it. I want her hand to graze my fingers. I want her to hold my wrist as she tried to teach me something; I don't know what, my attention is elsewhere. I feel as though I'm ignoring her, but I keep getting this feeling that she is only half paying attention as well. Her concentration is definitely on her hands, very scientific in her choice of just how she touches me. She's specific in how lightly she lays her hand on mine and I can feel her inventive form of flirtation. She is a clever girl. She always has been.

I keep looking to the clock. Every time I come, it's seven o'clock that the guards come to lead me out and bring that beautiful girl back to her whimsical jail cell. It feels more like seven minutes and I can hardly stand walking out that metal door. The code that they input to activate the lock makes me shutter with ever beep.

I don't tell anyone at work that I've been visiting her. I don't want to think what they would say. Dr. Director's response from the last meeting should be an indication. Kim Possible is the hero, a good girl. She doesn't fraternize with jail scum. Of course, Shego isn't your normal individual in jail. I mean, I guess there are plenty of really intelligent people in jail for elaborate theft or whatever, but they're not the same. They all say that they are brilliant, and many are. The problem is that for most of them, brilliance is coupled with insanity. Shego is not insane. She is far from it. She is brilliant, lovely and has more common sense than most, which is much to her advantage, or disadvantage of late.

She tells me about how being in the jail really takes its toll on her. She can't count days because she looses count. Every single one seems the same. She never had the intention to escape this time. She was going to serve out her life sentence and hope for parole because if there was parole, there was hope. There was the possibility of me. I had asked her what she would have done if she had gotten out in 50 years and we were old and I was living my own life. She told me that she would have been alright with that, that she would have been happy as long as she knew that I was happy and prosperous. She also told me that she never expected to have to wait that long. She always had the feeling that I would come.

I notice that she has stopped talking and for the most part has stopped moving. In my hand, there is a green crane. She has the backs of my hands in her palms and is stroking the sides with her thumbs. Shocked at the figure that seems like it magically appeared in my hands, I look up and try to wash off the confused look. I can see her grinning through soft eyes.

"Where are you exactly, Princess? Take me with you. It's lonely here." Her body jumps a little as she chuckles lightly. I smile and I stare at her. I love looking at her. I love ever last line and dot on her face. She closes her eyes for a second as her smile grows a bit. When she opens her eyes, she starts to run her nails down my wrist. I feel a chill and recoil with a shiver. She smiles and shows her teeth as she sits up in her chair.

"You make me crazy." I tell her simply. She looks sheepishly proud and leaned on her hands, elbows on the table.

"I love to see you." I think that she's going to say something else, but she doesn't.

"What do you mean?" I ask her because I know that she doesn't mean that she loves it when I visit. She does love it when I visit, but that is not what she was trying to say.

"I love the way you look. I love that you are right there and that I get to stare at you. I love counting those freckles that you're trying to cover up. They're adorable and you are beautiful. I love that I get to look at you."

I am taken back for a few seconds. It's so poetic and simple. It's Shego as I used to imagine her, simply perfect. I look at her and she sighs at me.

"There you go again, so far off. Why don't you take me there with you?" I'm addicted to her voice and the way that she speaks. I love the way that she is looking at me this very second, innocent and sweet, honest and mild. I reach out to her and instantly feel her hands in mine.

"How is it that you can do this to me?" I ask her, realizing how vague it was. She understands.

"How can I send you soaring? You're just lucky, but less lucky than I am." She really can be a charmer when she wants to be.

"Why less?"

"If what I do to you is like an aeroplane, me getting to look at you is like a starship." I smile instantly.

"If we're having a contest, I think that maybe we should call it a tie."

"I think that we should keep going actually. This is a contest that we both win." She grins at me and I know she's right. It makes me giggle which makes her smile in a way I've only seen a few times before. She doesn't show her teeth and she looks down and then up. And then she stares at me out of the corner of her eye.

"I love that." She says to me, or the floor where she is staring.

"Why's that?" I just want to hear her say it. She has a beautiful gift for flirting and I am a glutton for it.

"It's adorable. That little giggle, it's so fitting of you. It's like you should never stop. It's like music. It's so beautiful." If there is one thing that I have learned while visiting Shego, it is to know the feel of my cheeks blushing. I can feel it now. I have learned with much practice to feel the creeping rouge. I feel something in my hand, but it isn't her hand. I feel one of her hands cup the top of mine and present the crane in my palm to me. I smile wide. She takes it from my hand and makes the wings flap.

"Have you ever wondered what flying is like, Cupcake? It must be something fantastic. I've had some pretty incredible falls where it almost felt like I was flying. It's an odd sensation. I'm not very fond of these walls, Kimmy. I know it's a jail and I'm not really supposed to, but I think about flying sometimes and I grow a disdain for what this is. I grow jealous of flight." She puts the green crane back in my hand and leans back slowly to look out the barred window.

"I know that everyone dreams of flying, but it's not really what I'm after. I don't want to be a bird or anything. And all of that crap about flying being freedom is just cliché. I just want that feeling. I like the feeling of my stomach twisting around, threatening to burst out of my chest. I like being able to flail all of my limbs around and hit nothing. I like how I can barely feel my body. It's such a strange and amazing sensation. I can't even really describe it properly to you. I want to though. I really want to. I want to take you into flight with me Kimmy, so that you can experience it too." I hadn't noticed that I had started to stare out the window too until she touched my hand and startled me.

"You daydream an awful lot, don't you? What is it that you dream of? Where are you going?"

"With you." I say simply. She nods softly, knowing, and latches her fingertips onto mine.

Of course, as soon as her fingers have settled in place, there is a soft touch on my shoulder.

"Miss Possible..." He says, knowing that he doesn't have to finish. I see the clock. The hands spell out five past seven. Shego's hand has snaked its way into mine, palm to palm. As we rise, she comes to stand beside me and intertwines her fingers in mine. We walk in silence to her room and I can feel pinpricks all over my palm. It itches and it feels perfect.

At the door with the origami in the window, she turns to me and takes my other hand in the same way. She stares at me. We always do. We need to burn the image into our neurons. We need to not forget. She wants to remember every freckle on my face and I want to remember ever curve of hers in my dreams so that when my mind's hand runs over her cheek, I can feel it as it is.

With an inhale, we let go, but only just. Her hands slide away from mine, but I can still feel the pinpricks in my palm. I look down and there is our green crane.

I am Kim Possible. I feel only for her touch. Anything is possible, anything.

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**I feel kind of bad that this is shorter than the first chapter...and that I'm not working on my other stories, but im finding that writing this is actually very interesting. I've decided that I'm just going to go all out with the story that is a little bit beyond what might be expected. I've got a good idea and I think I can do something very cool here. Let me know what you think. This is so radically different from my other stories that I am really interested in what you, the readers are thinking. **

**As always, I don't own it, I just write it, but I do damn well own what I write.  
**


	3. Chapter 3: Cool Trailer People

**Why hello again! An old friend decided to show up in this story! Didn't even expect him! Writing is funny like that. I got a new HUUUGE stabilizing boot for my broken foot the other day! Just thought I'd share :P Sorry, I'm in a weird mood. Enjoy the update!**

**I don't own it, I just write it, what I write is MIEN! and I loooove getting love from you alls so send it on, my darling readers!  
**

* * *

I do a lot of lying around these days. I'm laying in the grass at the park in Middleton and staring at nothing in the sky. Dangerous thoughts float around in my head like clouds above me and I need to stop or I could do something stupid...again.

The other night, I got up to go to the bathroom at 3 am and the next thing I knew, I was parked in front of the penitentiary at sunrise. I don't know if I had driven in my sleep or if I had just spaced out for the two hour car ride. I scared myself and blasted rock music all the way home to make sure that I wouldn't fall asleep.

The frightening thing is that isn't the first time that things like that have been happening. The drive is definitely as bad as its gotten so far, but I think that I might be losing it. I sometimes space out for hours at a time. I'll go to do something and then come back to reality 20 minutes later doing something completely different with no recollection of what happened in between.

And the dreams are incredible. I don't know if they are incredible in a good or a bad way, but they are so vivid. She is in all of them. Putting aside the lusty dreams where I wake up and somehow taste her in my mouth, there are so many nights where I either wake up screaming and crying or smiling so hard that my face hurts for the rest of the day. On several occasions, I've awoken to the sound of my own voice. I set up my webcam to try to figure that one out and it looks like I talk in my sleep to her. Not only talk, but I act out all of the movement in my dreams. I've never done that before. I have always been a fairly heavy sleeper and I didn't even have many dreams before all of this.

I love the vivid dreams though. My favourite so far has been the two of us on a beach. No one else was around. She had said that her "connections" had gotten us use of an island. In my dream, she spoke and I listened, but I don't know what she said for the most part. My mind's eye was too busy admiring her, seeing her, taking her in. Then I heard the line that she said once about my daydreaming and I could hear her admiring words and soft whispers. Best of all, I could taste the kisses that she laid all over me. I could smell her, I could almost touch her. I woke with a pounding heart and sore cheeks.

I have had several where my failed attempts at breaking her out have...ended in her dying. Tragic, horrible, terrifying nightmares that I tried within the dream to escape and failed. Luckily I was always saved by my alarm. I have woken from those with a sore, raspy throat, tears all over myself, headaches, gasping for breath and dreading the next time that I would fall into dreaming.

I went to my mother about all of the weirdness after the drive to the jail. I was really scared. I didn't tell her about Shego or anything like that though. She blamed stress and told me that, like always, I need to slow down. I love my mother, but her answer was unfortunately of no use to me.

Before I know what's happening, I'm being pulled up from the grass and drawn into a bear hug.

"Kim! Oh man, its been so long since I've seen you!" Ron!

"Ron! What are you doing here?" I'm surprised, but not in an unpleasant way. I haven't seen Ron much since we left high school. The dating thing didn't last, especially after Shego started to consume my thoughts. I never told Ron about Shego, but we were able to end the relationship on good terms, thankfully. After that, life got in the way and we talked, just not very often.

"KP! You're crying!" He offers me his sleeve and I smile. Same old Ron. I shake my head and wipe my own eyes. He sits us both on the grass again.

"What's up KP?" I feel a tickle on my arm and look to see Rufus hugging my shoulder.

"I'm fine, just hay fever." I lie. I know it wont work, Ron is pretty good at picking up on that sort of thing.

"Naah uh. I don't think so. What's really going on?" He puts his arm over my shoulder and hugs me sideways. I always love it when Ron gets in his compassionate moods because it seems like its so unlike him, but perfect for him.

"Aww. Kim." She says softly as he pulls me closer. I take a moment to think and somehow, I've started sobbing without realizing it. I blend back into my reality and I can feel a pull in my chest. I have always trusted Ron. It figures that my messed up head would find solace in him. I guess I'm just lucky that he showed up today. I figure, I'm already this far, so I start to spill everything.

"Ron, I'm going insane."

"Ah come on, KP. That's a little dramatic."

"No, Ron. You don't get it. I think I'm literally going mental...all because of Shego."

"Wait, what? She's in jail."

"I've been there with her every weekend for the past few months."

"You're right, you are going insane."

"No, Ron. That's not what the problem is." I tell him all about the dreams and the spacing out. I tell him why I had broken up with him a few years back. I say too much.

"I love her." I hear it it, but I can't stop it. When I realize what I've said, I feel my body go cold.

I skip time, I think. The next thing I can remember is opening my eyes and seeing a bit of Ron's face among the clouds.

"KP! Kim! Oh, man. Are you okay? What happened?" I can see the terror on his face. I sit up and feel woozy instantly. I hold my head and he put his hands out to help steady me.

"I'm fine...or at least I was. What happened?" I squint as I get a pain behind my eyes.

"I don't know. You passed out."

"Why?"

"I dunno! You said you loved Shego..."

"Oh no..." Ron tightens his grip as I say that.

"No, it's ok Ron, I'm not going to pass out again. Or...at least I hope not. I just...I can't believe..."

"Was that the first time you said it?" He smiles slightly. I nod at him.

"It gets easier...and better." He says grinning.

"Ron, what am I going to do? She's in jail."

"Maybe you could be like one of those people who has a lover in jail! I saw a T.V. Show about that once! They write letters and visit and they have like a normal relationship except that one of them is behind bars and then sometimes-"

"Ron..." I giggle and he smiles back.

"It can happen!"

"Yes, it totally can. It would be far more pleasant if I could have her with me outside of that place."

"You could always break her out."

"Come on, Ron."

"You could. I'd help."

"What?" I laugh and scoff at the same time.

"It'd be totally cool to be on the other side! I would be all like 'I'm breaking into the jail! And then we're breaking out!' And then we could go on the lamb and meet all sorts of cool people when we camp in trailer parks and stuff!" Rufus agrees in clicking mumbles as he usually does. I laugh. Its a fantastic relief.

"Ron, while cool trailer people sound fascinating, I don't think that would work too well overall."

"Aww! You don't even want to give it a try?" He smiles compassionately.

"You know Ron, I didn't know it, but you were just what I needed today."

"Aren't you so lucky that I had biznaaz to take care of with Hana?" I giggle more.

"The luckiest. How is your sister?"

"Adorable! Deadly... but adorable!"

"She's been getting good at all of that stuff she does huh?"

"Yeah, that stuff... I don't even know what goes on with her. Ah well. As long as it isn't monkey powers, we're good!"

"I thought you got over that."

"Sort of..." His eyes dart around suspiciously. I hug him with a grin.

"Hey, while I'm here, want to go to Bueno Nacho for old times? I'm starving!" I laugh out loud.

"Of course you are! Sure, lets go." Some things never change. That much is a comfort. Sometimes, those things can be dangerous too though. He has me thinking. I'm wondering if he was serious. I'm wondering if he really would help me get her out.

"Ron?" I ask as we get to his car.

"What's up, KP? You don't want to skip the Nacos, do you?" He says with a little dramatic horror in his voice.

"No, no. I'm actually kind of hungry."

"Oh good." He said quickly as he wipes his brow for effect.

"Doesn't your aunt work for the state?"

"Sure."

"The corrections unit?"

"Yeah, she heads it. What about aunt Judy?"

"Maybe she can help."

"I don't think she knows how to make Nacos..." I chuckle and roll my eyes.

"No, Ron! Maybe she can help with Shego."

"Oh, maybe..."

I am Kim Possible. I am going to hurt everyone I love as this obsession consumes me. I can't stop.


	4. Chapter 4: Then We Live

There is a single bead of sweat rolling past my ear. It tickles my cheek and tortures my senses, but I let it continue down its path. I don't care to move, I only care to feel. I feel the air as it passes through my lungs. I feel my eyes as they follow the faint brush patterns on my ceiling. I feel the few thoughts in my head as they spark over each synapse in my brain.

'Breathe in. And out. Now blink.' Detaching from my surroundings, I seem to be in a waking dream. I cannot see her, but I can hear her soft breathing near my ear, much like the breeze from my window. I can feel her fingertips trace the paths left by the falling beads of perspiration. I can just barely taste the scent of her as the breeze washes me with her. And then as I open my mouth slightly in response, I can feel it as her lips approach mine.

I gasp, realizing that I have stopped breathing. In that instant, my senses lose her. I fumble to sit up a little, confused as to where she could have gotten to. It wouldn't have been the first time that she had stealthily found her way into my room. She had snuck in at least once when I was in high school. I hadn't known why then and I never had given her the chance to explain. I expected that it had been like every other encounter between us then, some illegal happenings had led her to me. Looking back, I'm not sure that she even knew why she was there that night. She had left completely flustered and in a hurry.

My breath is hitching and I'm struggling to breathe. My face has become a wash of tears and sweat falling together as I realize finally that she had never been in my room this time.

And just like that, again I'm at the penitentiary. It's a Tuesday evening and no one will be expecting me. I ignore the fact that the last thing I remember is gasping in my bedroom and walk to the gate. The cure in the past has always been her, there's no reason that today should be different.

I go through the motions with the guards at the front and they do their standard searches and checks but I'm growing impatient. My feet are shifting and shuffling against my will. I'm beginning to panic. I can feel my chest tighten; I notice my breath getting shorter. As they finally lead me down the hall to her, I step quickly on my toes. I must look completely absurd, I know it. But I'm so close to relief.

At her door, time slows in my head. The blare of each entry from the pass code lingers in my mind. It shocks through my ears and rattles on for ages between them. A blink of my eye takes hours. The turning of the key when the pass code is finally entered rings through my eyes and ears like a gunshot. Like a video out of synch, the sound comes first and the vision follows after. I fall behind in my vision as I hear the door open, but my eyes do not see it. I try to catch up, I need to catch up. I don't see as she approaches, I don't see as my feet move of their own accord to her.

As I fall against her in agony, she gathers me and holds me up. Finally, my vision rushes to the current scene and the ticking of my watch is in time with reality.

"It's too hot." I babble against her, absently. Her chest rises and I feel myself displaced before her breath runs through my hair.

"It certainly is, Princess." She answers softly, close to my ear. She holds my head tight to her and waits.

When I can move again, she walks with her arm propping up my waist to the gathering room. We sit next to each other at a table and she faces me.

"You're pale." I watch her lips as she softly strokes her knuckle along my cheek. Absently, I turn into her touch like a cat. She catches the side of my head in her palm and smiles. I can feel her thumb as it barely bushes my ear. My head feels carbonated after the feelings that led me here.

"I love you." I hear myself say. I see her close her eyes and grins before she leans in and brushes her lips against mine. Barely a kiss and yet, exactly perfect. She lingers for a moment with her eyes closed before she retreats from me. The hairs on my arms stand up as she runs her own palms down to grasp mine. She stares at me as she kisses them and holds them close to her chest, still staring.

"Why are you pale, Pumpkin?" I open my mouth but realize that I don't want to respond, so I shutter. She kisses my hands again, one at a time and then one final time, lingering. Tired of softness, I tear her to me and crash into her. I devour her and she does the same to me. I realize that Shego has always been cautious. It is what makes her such a fantastic thief and spy. I tired long ago of her caution, of her calculation of every move. Often, it is sweet and reassuring but sometimes it's strangling. And, when she finally stops calculating, her freed self is primal and needy, ferocious and spectacular.

I truly could not care less that every eye in the room is fixated on us. I welcome their gaze, witnesses to the reality that is between Shego and me. But I do pull back, circling in my thoughts and disoriented.

"We can get you out of here." I say plainly to her, probably too loud. Her eyes go wide and I watch the color drain from her face.

"Stop it, Kim. My term here will be over when the judge deems fit." She speaks more loudly than usual and with a force she's never used with me. She stares at me after subtly scanning the stares in the room.

"Do you understand, Kim?" She stares deeply. I nod to her.

"Good girl. I'm sorry." She pulls me to her and holds me, but turns to my ear.

"Speak softly and pretend that it's lover's chat. I don't know what you're trying to do, but I want to know what you're thinking." She whispers into my hair. I nod lightly and hum. As she backs away from me, we stay close. I lean and lay my head against her shoulder as she puts her arm around me. I put on a dumb grin as I speak.

"Ron's in town."

"This is your plan? Captain Boxershorts?" I giggle and shake my head. At least my grin is real now.

"Ron's aunt has a high position in the corrections department. There's a chance that we can get you a reduced sentence – seriously reduced. Maybe even a re-trial."

"I'm pretty guilty, Kimmy. The evidence is brick and mortar."

"People get out on technicalities all the time."

"And if it doesn't work?" She begins to stroke my hair.

"If it doesn't work…" I find her other hand and hold it dearly.

"If it doesn't work, I have far less legal ideas. You are a criminal mastermind after all."

"And if I somehow do get out, then what?" The conversation has become strangely sensual. As we talk, we stroke one another's hands and hair, we nuzzle against the other, and as she questions, Shego kisses my head. I turn my face up to her.

"Then we live." I hitch up and peck her on the lips. She giggles in surprise and the sound is fireworks.

"It sounds so simple."

"I love you, Shego."

"I love you."

"Miss Possible-" Interrupted as usual. He speaks as he approaches so he could not have heard our whispers, but still I startle. Shego puts both arms around me to calm my shredded nerves. We roll our eyes as we get up and begin the long walk back to Shego's cell.

The possibilities of the situation swim around my head as we walk. I see my dreams and my nightmares fly through my mind. Grounded for just a few more moments until she's forced to leave me, I let the ideas settle. I want her with me. I want her forever. And yet, I can only ask myself over and over, is it really worth risking losing her forever? Do I allow her to stay caged and safe, or do I get the prize, disregarding the possibility of…

I don't want to think it.


	5. Chapter 5: Best Friends Forever

**SO...I have no real way to explain away the intensely long wait on this one. I had a lot of stuff going on for a while and then when I finally looked at it again, I had lost my story completely. Now though, I have some stuff planned for you guys. I think you'll like it and I want to thank you all so much for sticking with my stories, this one especially. I'm very pleased with it. **

**I hope you enjoy and I hope you like the rest to come. **

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I can see as my eyes blur when his hand turns the page. I can no longer decipher what he's saying. It's a blur of sound, a grey bubble that I can't be bothered to get out of. I feel my mind slow and go static.

Her arms ghost around my waist. Her exhale pricks at the nape of my neck. My breathing slows but my heart races. My toes have gone numb. My fingers follow. I fall back against her, breathing out and trusting her to catch me.

But she doesn't.

And I slam the back of my head into Ron's coffee table.

"KP!" I hear him shout as my senses return. They fade in and out and I can't decipher what he says next. I hear him, but the words do not make sense to me. Only after he lays his hands on me to pull me up do I flinch and plummet fully into the real world.

"Kim! Come on, Kim! Open up your eyes!" He uses his fingers to pry open my left eye and I groan against the light. I screw my eyes closed and inhale deeply before I open them again. Ron looks terrified. My eyes glance downward slightly when I feel the guilt of making Ron worry.

"Maybe you should see a doctor, KP." He says softly, failing to hide the fright in his voice. I reach behind my head to sooth the throb in my skull only to be met with sticky wetness. When I pull my hand forward to reveal blood, Ron is again terrified. He starts muttering so quickly that I can't make out what he's saying and fumbles to sit me against the sofa as he trips to stand up.

"Ron." I call after him. He doesn't stop and probably doesn't hear me. I call his name louder and he turns briefly to me.

"Ron what are you doing?" I say, loud enough for my voice to crack.

"I'm getting the car to bring you to the ER!" And he turns back to the door.

"Ron! Come back here and sit!" I call forcefully to him. He looks pathetic as he turns and obeys. As he sits, he fidgets. I play with the gash in my scalp for a moment.

"I don't need stitches, Ron. Just a clean towel and some aspirin, okay?"

"KP, there are many reasons you should be in a hospital right now and that cut is only one of them."

"I'm sorry, Ron. I just didn't sleep very much last night. I guess it caught up with me."

"Bull!" I am momentarily struck by his response.

"Excuse me?"

"I saw you when we were looking at the file. The file that you brought. The file that you wanted to look at to try to help get your prison girlfriend broken out. That wasn't dosing off. That was that thing that you do these days."

"What thing?" Ron's eyes get angrier and he puts his finger in my face, accusing me.

"You know what thing. I know you know the thing. Don't pretend you don't know about the thing 'cause Rufus is trained as a lie detector." I had tried to brush off the weird things that were happening so that I could seem normal around Ron. I tried to play it off as a fluke or exhaustion but Ron is not as dumb as he seems sometimes.

"Are we going to continue to call it 'the thing'?"

"Don't change the subject." A smug smirk paints his face.

"Fine. There is a thing. However, if I can get Shego out of there, I have a hunch that the thing will get better." He gets up and gets me a wet dishtowel and painkiller.

"Ah so it's one of those kind of things." The greatest thing about Ron is that, at moments such as this, he is completely serious. I am amused but I am growing tired of it, so I snap. Just a bit.

"Ron! Stop it with the thing! Just help me figure out what all of this means so that I can finally get past it!" I slap my hand down on the file and Ron jumps. He nods slowly as he picks up the pages.

"So, I really don't get it. What are we trying to do?"

"I got a copy of Shego's file and I-"

"How'd you get this thing anyway? I thought it was confidential."

"You forget I'm technically law enforcement. All I had to say was that I was looking for some other nobody's file and I was in the stacks. Snapped some shots of the pages and printed them out when I got home."

"Smart. But that doesn't tell me what I'm trying to find."

"Anything that might get her out on a technicality. A moment where she was mistreated by the courts or the cops or anyone. Or something else. I don't know what else exactly."

"That all sounds unlikely."

"It mostly is."

"So then what?" I don't know how to answer that question. It's one that I've been avoiding throughout this whole plan. It frightens me the most because if there is no technical, legal way to get Shego out, the only other options that I can think of are not legal and not safe. Then, the question becomes am I willing to risk both of our lives to get her out of prison? Myself, I would do it without a second thought but I know that Shego would never allow it. Her, on the other hand, I'm just not sure that I could ever risk her. Ron shrugs next to me after a moment of my not answering.

"Well, I guess there's nothing to do but try, right?" I smile at him on instinct.

"You really are the best friend I could ever ask for, Ron." He cocks his head sideways and his grin looks confused, but straightens quickly.

"Duh, KP! Possible and Stoppable can never be broken!" He pats me on the back and I hug him.

"Don't you worry, KP. We can find a way to get Shego out. You are Kim Possible, after all." He holds me at arm's length and I can see his mouth move as he speaks. He even speaks with a smile. Suddenly, I'm struck by some memories. My face falls and I watch Ron's fall in response. As I lean back again onto the sofa, he settles staring at me, worried again.

"You know, I'm sorry we didn't really work out, Ron."

"What d'ya mean?" His worry blends to confusion.

"When we were dating. We could have been good together. We should have been good together." And then he scoffs and snickers.

"Kim, you were soooooo into Shego. That totally would not have worked out."

"You knew!?" I am shocked. I could not possibly have been that obvious, especially if I, myself did not know.

"Well, I mean I didn't really have the whole picture back then, but it always felt like I was the warm body that you pretended was someone else." He looks across the room with a smile, but it almost appears as if he were grieving. I turn and put my arms around him.

This is Ron Stoppable. My BFF since pre-school, my sidekick extraordinaire, one of the greatest people I have ever known. He always does the right thing, he is always the bigger person, and even when it's his own heart broken, he makes sure the right things happen.

"I love you, Ron." I sigh, knowing that despite all of the hassle I put him through, he will always be my best friend. He returns the embrace, Rufus skittering up to join in the love.

"Best friends forever, KP."

A few moments pass and he pats my back and turns to the file with determination.

"Okay! One plasma throwing supervillain dismissal coming right up!" He riffles through the paper so quickly I'm sure he's not actually reading anything. I look over the pages he discards and hold the towel to my head.

"Hey KP?" Ron slides me a folded paper with a sticky note on top and a photo papercliped to the inside. I look it over.

"I think we just found our out." He is smug with excitement and puts up his fist expectantly. I laugh, equally excited and complete his fist bump.


	6. Chapter 6: Designed to be Silent

_I really do love this story. It's so interesting to write. I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoy making it._

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"What if it doesn't work?" I ask into her shoulder, feeling sleep threatening to fill every exposed part of me. Her hand pulses on mine the simplest yet most comforting motion.

"If it doesn't work, it doesn't work." She keeps staring ahead of her as if there is something to see in the slate-painted walls before her.

"It has to work." I'm muttering, barely noticing what I'm saying. She takes my hand into hers fully and puts her other on top.

"I love you anyway."

I'm shocked momentarily when I blink out of the past. My daydreams melt into reality. I try to stop it; I try to remain in the present, in the real world but it always seems to fail. It's so much nicer to be with her, even in the setting of that grey, awful building. Even that is far more desirable than the oak paneled court room. She's on the other side of this room, looking at me, that tight, quiet grin somehow both calming and quickening my heart.

I want to hear the lawyers. I want to hear the testimonies, the arguments; I want to know what they're saying about her, but I can't. I can't bear it if they say something I don't agree with, so I tune them out and I keep my eyes fixed on her when my mind isn't dreaming. All of a sudden, the judge is speaking. I seem to have missed the jury going to deliberate. I ignore the thought of time skipping again.

The verdict stands.

The verdict what? I blink at the rate of film from a projector and the scene before my eyes shutters rapidly. My ears reverse and sound leaves me, save for the rushing of my own blood in my veins. With my shuttering vision, I remember to duck as we planned. Swiftly setting fire to the wooden wall behind the judge, I see my Shego, the woman I once knew, come back into the hull that I had found recently. The ignition of her hands matches the blaze in her eyes, a burn that I have not seen since graduation.

I follow her as we vault over dividers and spectator seats. We push people aside and all I know is that I must have her hand in mine, so I follow until I can put it there safely. Security all over the building seems to have been alerted and they're running at us by the dozen. Unfortunate that they underestimate what she and I are capable of. I run sideways into a wall and continue my forward motion, using my hands on the heads of the guards to keep me above them. Shego vaults over them two at a time, pulling them into one another and creating a tumbling wave of bodies.

As we find ourselves at the far end of the mass of guards, we hear several voices calling out for us to freeze. This means guns. We both know it and we both know what to do. We continue ahead at full sprint and we start to weave from side to side in the narrow hall, ducking and rising to add to our evasion. The bullets fly wildly around us and I wonder if the armed guards are even trying to aim.

With a response like that, we know that the real police are on their way, not that we can't outwit them as well. It would however, be far simpler to avoid the officers. I feel myself thrown roughly through a glass panel. As I roll back into my sprint, I see that Shego had been the one to pull me as she jolts her own body back up. We run into a room, slam and lock the door, the next room, slam and lock, and one more before she skitters to a stop and looks expectantly out the window.

"You're sure he's there?"

"He promised."

"You trust a promise alone?" She breathes heavily and her fingertips are going ghost white with the force she's clutching the windowsill.

"I trust him." She takes a brief second to look me head to toe and back.

"Okay." She says with certainty as she puts her hand on the glass. Her hands glow green and the area is suddenly molten, cascading over the edge of the windowsill and building. She shakes off her hands as the material begins to harden again and looks towards me.

"Ready?" She asks over her shoulder while climbing into the new hole. I breathe deep and she smiles.

As I blink, I find that we're not in the building anymore. In fact, it's several blocks behind us.

"Diplomat car. Nice touch." Shego admires, looking carefully out of the tinted windows of the black sedan.

"It's so we can look legit." Ron smiles from the front seat, his meticulous chauffeur uniform just slightly too big for his slim frame. I don't feel safe exactly, but I do feel like we are most definitely in the clear.

"What did you do with the Laotian Head of Agriculture anyway?" I ask, feeling smug and confident in how the emergency backup plan has played out.

"The what now?" Shego asks, turning her attention back to me from outside. I grin at her.

"We didn't tell the whole, entire plan. It turns out, the Head of Agriculture from Laos is in town today and has a driver service in an exceptionally regular vehicle. The sort of vehicle that doen't look out of place." I squeeze her hand as my adrenaline stoked blood courses through me and makes me shake.

"Very nice." She puts her hand on my leg and turns a small, soothing circle with her forefinger.

"KP?" Ron has so far done very well hiding his apprehension about everything, but it appears to be wearing thin and his voice cracks as he questions.

"What's up?"

"Are you sure it's gonna be there?" In the rear view, I can see a light wash of distrust in his eyes. I turn to Shego and I squeeze her hand. She looks insulted. I squeeze harder.

"What do you take me for , you buffoon?" The atmosphere in the car has taken a hairpin turn to extremely tense. I have to take the match away from the powder keg so I shuffle closer to Shego and take her face into my hands. Perhaps a little coarse, but all is forgiven when I place my lips to hers. Instantly, her body slackens and her once tight jaw loosens. Her body is putty for my molding, my arms and hands nothing more than tools for me to gather her. In my own body, I feel like I can finally take a full breath again. It has been a long time. Her lips are soft and they taste like ice without being cold. I have never been allowed to be this close to her. When we fought; we touched, we tumbled, but ultimately we hurt. When she was in prison, a half dozen eyes always watched us and I could never come to know her as I am now.

Now I can feel her - truly feel her.

The recent quirks that plague me are at this moment, exceptional, lending what they take from my senses to other functions. Wherever my skin touches hers, I am aware of her beating blood. Her heart is going faster than mine. She twitches just before her hand touches a different part of my arm. Her breath stutters very slightly every time our lips leave one another and she grins every time they return. The air feels like a wave as it leaves her nose and washes over my skin, drawing speckles of my skin up. Off in the distance, the car hums around us and farther out, another sound invades. Disturbed from my observations of my green girl, I linger before I reluctantly let go of her kiss.

Without removing myself too far from her, I take in my surroundings. The far off sound was...traffic?

"We're downtown."

"Yup." Ron answers quietly from the driver seat. "Not to break up the love-fest but Shego, what's the exact place I'm going?" Shego, who has apparently been in a little trance, stops staring at me and shakes her head back to reality. Her eyes go wide and she blinks a few times. I giggle at her, feeling my stomach flutter and knowing my role in her lost state.

"We're...It's up the uh... the interstate. We ride that out for about forty miles and the place is, well, literally under a rock."

"And that should be fully stocked?"

"It's one of Drakken's most recent lairs. No guarantees, but it's probably our best bet." Ron looks unconvinced, but nods at his instructions. As I settle back against Shego again, I can feel a flood of fear engulf us all. I swallow hard, trying to swallow the sudden urge to vomit. I watch as Shego balls her fists hard and see Ron's head bobbling around in tiny movements. He's scared. He's looking for something to be following us.

We're silent. It's so quiet that I can hear the pull of the high quality engine even though its designed to be silent. I can hear the tires as they tear carefully at the asphalt. I can hear Ron's light and methodic breath as it exits his mouth. Outside the window, the city rolls by us. Metallic blue and glassy silvers streak by my vision and put me into a soft place. With her heartbeat resonating against my skin, I am entranced.


End file.
